I’m gonna sell my virginity to the highest bidder too, then.

According to various reports, 22-year-old Natalie Dylan is an okay-looking girl looking to auction off her virginity to the highest bidder online. It’s been reported that offers are reaching as high as 3.3 million. (source= CNN.com).

Now 3.3 million is alot of money. Alot of “closed minded” aka “old people over 29″ are up in arms about this. I think those people are just living in the past. My arms are also up, except instead of being “upset” arms, they are to high-five girls like Natalie and say, “You go, girl!”

This gave me a brilliant idea. Why not sell MY virginity too? I mean, we’re all for gender equality here in the 2000′s. What beautiful, rich female heirress WOULDN’T want the virginity of a 115 pound barely pubescent looking azn male??

That’s right, JetGeneration fans. We are offering you, the readership, the exclusive opportunity to bid on a whole 5 1/2 inches of solid MAN (cold withstanding). I may have never seen an actual vagina IRL before, but I accidently brushed against my moms’ bestfriends’ boob once when I was 14. And I watch alot of PornHub.com, so I kind of know what IT* is like. Girls like anal, right? Because I mean, the odds of getting pregnant are scientifically proven to be slightly less. They also like it when you spit in their mouths and squirt your load in their eyes.

Here’s me:

Who needs practice when you can learn everything on “the net”, yenno?

Bidding will start at 12pm EST tomorrow.

I promise to rock. your. world.

girl.

Starting offer: $1,000 (no reserve)
BUY it now: $1,100

P.S. Plz send pix and A/S/L inquiries along with your bid. Additional proceeds will be donated to orphans with poor parents.

// Jimmy Wang, Editorial Intern @ JetGeneration.

* IT = male/female intercourse.